我不知道

spike.spiegel

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头好疼，思想好乱
  也许这就是我的偏执，这就是自我欺骗，1年前就有的结论我却一直不去面对，哪怕嘴上说着不会。“我爱他呵呵，我去过济南了”1句话把我重建了8个月的世界打碎了，我是个很讨人厌的孩子，因为我从不按常理出牌，可这次，我所希望老天也讨厌次，眷顾次我，我也是个点很被的孩子，只要是赌一把的事情从来没赢过，可这次我真的想赢一次。
  朋友总是说要我开始新的感情，我试过，可始终进不了状态，现在的我太忧伤，太悲哀，太黑暗，太颓废。这种感觉会传染，会销蚀身边的人，所以我选择压抑，选择自我封闭。
  现在已经没人看的见我的心了，太黑，太暗，太困难，想想心理医生对我无奈的摇头我就知道他也救不了我，是我太固执，是我自己藏的太深。
  如此的我竟然能帮助别人，感觉自己很像一个容器，吸收别人的痛苦和忧愁。。。接着。。。让自己的更加沉重。插满烟头的烟灰缸。。。。摆满空酒瓶的地板。。。。烟雾缭绕的房间。。。。镜子里没有血色的脸。。。。无助，渴望被救恕，可我又是绝对的中立者，信仰救不了我，没有信仰也一样，疼
  人到底是矛盾的集合体，绝望的同时却又留恋着生活，痛苦的同时却又去憧憬幸福。我成熟，但我又爱做梦，一个又一个美丽神奇的梦，也许，对自我的评价过高，我只是个爱做梦的小孩

  我不知道还要这样多久，但我知道压抑不能解决问题，沉默不能改变一切，我只求自己不要被哀伤吞没，不要被黑暗束缚。是我太傻，太笨，太顽固，是自己不晓得怎样放下，是自己太爱做梦，是我的错。。。我的错。。。我的



Eversleeping

that there once will be a better tomorrow

once I traveled 7 rivers to find my love

and once,for 7 years I forgot my name

well,if I have to I will die 7 death just to lie

in the arms of my eversleeping aim

I will rest my head side by side

to the one that stays in the night

I will lose my breath in my last words of sorrow

and whatever comes will come soon

dying I will pray in the moon

that there once will be a better tomorrow

I will rest my head side by side

to the one that stays in the night

I will lose my breath in my last words of sorrow

and whatever comes will come soon

dying I will pray in the moon

that there once will be a better tomorrow

I dreamt last night that he came to me

he said my love why do you cry?

for now it won't be long anymore

星星堆满天

Disguise     Lene Marlin      

Have you ever felt some kind of emptiness inside
You will never measure up, to those people you
Must be strong, can't show them that you're weak

Have you ever told someone something
That's far from the truth
Let them know that you're okay
Just to make them stop
All the wondering, and questions they may have

I'm okay, I really am now
Just needed some time, to figure things out
Not telling lies, I'll be honest with you
Still we don't know what's yet to come

Have you ever seen your face,
In a mirror there's a smile
But inside you're just a mess,
You feel far from good
Need to hide, 'cos they'd never understand

Have you ever had this wish, of being
Somewhere else
To let go of your disguise, all your worries too
And from that moment, then you see things clear

I'm okay, I really am now
Just needed some time, to figure things out
Not telling lies, I'll be honest with you
Still we don't know what's yet to come

Are you waiting for the day
When your pain will disappear
When you know that it's not true
What they say about you
You could not careless about the things
Surrounding you
Ignoring all the voices from the walls

I'm okay, I really am now
Just needed some time, to figure things out
Not telling lies, I'll be honest with you
Still we don't know what's yet to come

I'm okay, I really am now
Just needed some time, to figure things out
Not telling lies, I'll be honest with you
Still we don't know what's yet to come
Still we don't know what's yet to come
Still we don't know what's yet to come

破日

果然很沉重，要慢慢的调整，虽然我知道这样说对你起不了什么作用